What Lord…Gestational Diabetes?

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13

When I was pregnant with our 4th blessing, I went in for my usual glucose test at 27 weeks. I didn’t think twice about it. It was just another test I had to take. When the phone rang and it was my midwife on the other end, I was shocked to hear I failed. Who likes to hear you failed even when you had no control over the situation. I thought for sure it had to be a mistake.

So, I went in for my three hour glucose test. To my surprise again, I failed! “This has got to be a mistake,” I said to myself, “I eat healthy and I exercise. Why Lord, why would this happen to me? ” I was so confused and disappointed. That moment in time my whole idea of eating completely changed. The freedom I once had was now gone and I would have to begin watching everything I ate. I was motivated because I was doing it for the little life I carried inside of me. But it was hard…so, so hard.

I thought I was home free after our little boy was born. But after failing my glucose test again with our 5th blessing, I spiraled down the shocked lane once again. This time I was angry…so, so, angry. I cried. I was heartbroken. I was angry because my husband and I agreed in prayer that we should be open to having as many blessings as God desires for us. “God, I am so done with having babies after this,” I cried out to my Heavenly Father. “I can’t do this anymore. I am so mad. This is so hard. I am done!”

In that same moment, I realized the enemy was attacking me in my time of weakness and frustration. He was breaking me down, kicking me, and filling my head with lies. He was working hard to get me to deny the calling God put upon me and my husband’s hearts. I ALMOST gave in…but with all the strength I could muster up in that moment, I sent Satan on his way OUT…”Get thee behind me Satan. For the Lord, my God is with me. He will never leave me or forsake me.”

Had I shut that door, we would not have been blessed with our 6th blessing last July. Though that pregnancy came with trials, I was blessed to be FREE from the 4 times a day of pricking my fingers and testing (PRAISE THE LORD!!!!). Was I free to eat whatever I wanted? NO. Was it easy? NO. But I was still free…free in the arms of my Savior holding me up when I would fall. Free to believe that God is mighty, powerful, and awesome and when I put my trust in Him, He will not let me down. Free to believe that even though the trials will come, He will not give me more than I can handle (without His help of course!). Free to believe that I am not perfect but I can grow into the woman that God wants me to be one day at a time…and that is where I want to be.

I believe that I can do all things because Christ is the one strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 is one of my favorite verses and I keep close in my heart. It gets me through the rough homeschooling days to dealing with the loss of my niece at 20 weeks gestation. It gets me through drug-free labors and deliveries to sleepless nights with a newborn. It gets me through the times I feel abandoned because nothing is going right to the child that needs special care when I have nothing left to offer.

We all experience various trials in life. Some last a day, and some seem to last forever. Some we overcome, some shatter us into a million pieces. Whatever you may be going through, choose to take it to Jesus and let Him strengthen you through the trials of life. He can pick up the shattered pieces of your life and make it into something beautiful. God is faithful. Through Jesus, may you discover JOY in the midst of your circumstances.

Share:

Have you experienced times when you felt God forgot about you? How did you handle it? What is your favorite verse that gets you through your trials?